Fanfiction: Love Letters [Valentines Project]

Love Letters

By: nikolojeyb

Properly credit to the author and RYPH FC

February 17, 2014

To my Husband in the Future,

At the time of this letter, surely you don't know me yet. But I know you. You've been in my heart since the first time I ever saw you. You were the only person who can break and mend my heart at the same time. I don't know why it has ever happened to me, but I don't care either. I don’t want to bother myself with trivial things such as that. The feeling is so ecstatic that I feel my heart blow up due to so much happiness.

You might be wondering, “What the heck is this all about?!” Now I tell you, you may not be aware that I exist, but I am aware that you do. We may have never met, yet. But I can tell you now that I am in love with you. I love you, even though it’s only a one-sided love.

We may be oceans apart. I am here, you are there. But the distance between us won’t be enough reason for me to let go of my feelings for you. I won’t stop hoping and wishing that someday, you and I will meet face to face. And I believe that that someday is not too far away. It’s not impossible, for as long as we walk on the same earth, breath the same wind and look up at the same sky. You and I will soon be possible in this lifetime, or even in the next.

And when that someday comes, I promise to love you endlessly. I will support you with your career. I will love you as much as I love myself. I’ll be your best friend to confide your worries to; your sister to give you every advice that you need; a mother to give anything that you need and a wife to stand up with you through thick and thin, in sickness and in health. I will make sure that you will be well taken care of.

I love you, and I will respect your every decision. I will consider your opinion on everything. I will be the kind of wife that you’ve ever dreamt of. And whatever happens, I’ll stay by your side. I won’t leave you unless you ask me to.

I promise to love you forever, in this lifetime and in the next ones to come. I will always and forever love you. I am looking forward to meeting you, Mr. Yamada Ryosuke.

Love lots,

Niki

I found this letter from the box that she left; the box which contained the proof of her fandom. It contains copies of our singles and magazines in which we are on the cover. She really likes me that much. Oh, no. ‘Like’ is an understatement. She really loved me that much. I know it. I felt it during the times that we are together. The times when I was still her husband and she was still my wife.

I took out all the CDs from the box and found another neatly folded piece of paper.

March 20, 2018

To my beloved husband,

Yey! I told you, we are possible. You and I can happen in reality. I am now Mrs. Yamada Niki. You just don’t know how happy I am that my all-time dream had come to reality. I am so happy; no words can ever define what I am feeling right now.

The memories of our wedding, especially your vow, still lingered in my ears. It doesn’t leave my head. I’m wondering about how you were feeling. Do you feel the same way? I hope so, because I want you to be happy. I want us to live happy, as a couple.

Let’s live a blissful life as we wait for our angels to come our way.

Your loving wife,

Niki

We were so happy back then. We loved each other. We planned our future together, we’ve already thought of the names we’ll give our future kids. We dreamt of having twins. We wanted to have a girl and a boy. Who would have thought that those plans will never be fulfilled and the dream we had will never come to reality?

This is my entire fault. If only I didn’t cheat on her. If only I’ve been contented with her. If only I’ve recognized her unconditional love for me, I wouldn’t be left here alone. I wouldn’t be just thinking of her. She would have been here with me, celebrating my birthday together. But no, I am alone on my birthday. There’s no one to organize a party, no one to tell me that I grow more handsome this year. No one to tell me how much I am loved.

The door bell of my apartment rang and as I opened the door, I saw the postman waiting for me.

“Documents for Mr. Yamada Ryosuke,” said the postman.

“From who?” I asked.

He checked the envelope before he answered, “From Mrs. Yamada Niki.” He handed me the envelope.

I took the envelope with shaking hands. Is this it? Has she signed it already? No, please, God, no. Please, tell me she hasn’t decided yet. I don’t know what I can do to myself if she did. Stupid. I was so stupid for letting this happen. I have been blinded by temptation. I failed to recognize her affection, her efforts in understanding my career. I failed to appreciate the way she took care of me. The sacrifices she made for me. She could have been a successful scientist if only I didn’t ask her to be a full-time housewife.

I can feel my whole body tremble as I signed the receipt from the postman. I stood still as I watch him leave. I can’t pull myself to open the envelope. I tried to compose myself and took a deep breath. Even my breath brings sharp pains in my chest. Regret. That is how I’m feeling right now. I regret being a jerk. I regret being an ungrateful husband and I regret that I let go of the best woman I can ever have. But now, it’s too late. She has decided to sign the divorce papers I sent her.

I gathered all my courage to pull the pieces of paper out of the envelope and prepared myself for what I am about to see. On top of the stapled divorce papers was a sheet of paper with her handwriting.

May 9, 2019

To my soon to be ex-husband,

I am really sorry that it took me too long to sign the papers you have sent me three months ago. It may sound stupid and pathetic, but I’ll tell it anyway. I’m still hoping that you might change your mind about the divorce. I’m still wishing that you’ll find in your heart the love that was there for me. I’m still waiting for you to realize that you didn’t want me to leave your life.

Yeah, that was the most stupid thing on the face of the earth. But now, I’m back to my senses and I have accepted the fact that you wouldn’t ever change your mind. It hurts so much, but if it is what will make you happy, so be it. As promised, I respect your decision. I won’t force you to still love me when you don’t feel it anymore.

I’m sorry.

PS: I’ll be going back to the Philippines today. I’ll be staying there for good. So, I guess, this is really goodbye. Thanks for the memories you’ve shared with me. I love you, always remember that. I’ll still be your fan.

Take care, always.

Love,

Niki

No. I won’t accept this. I stormed out of the apartment and drove to the airport. I should stop her. She shouldn’t leave. She promised me, she’ll never leave. She never breaks any of her promises.

I went to the ticket counter and asked the receptionist, “What time is the flight going to the Philippines?”

She looked at her watch and answered, “The plane going to the Philippines has just left ten minutes ago. The next flight will be at seven o’clock tonight.”

I glanced at the wall clock behind the receptionist. It’s already four o’clock. My shoulders slouched as I walk lifelessly to the lobby. I sat on the chairs and blamed myself for this misfortune. I’ve lost the best girl in the world. I pushed her away. I chose my freedom over her. I’m so stupid. Now what? She already left. She won’t be coming back. “Poor Yamada Ryosuke. Stupid,” I cursed under my breath.

I continued cursing myself, ignoring the people who stare at me. I don’t care what they think about me. I don’t care about anything right now.

“Yamada-san?” a familiar voice filled my ears. I lifted my head and my jaw dropped the moment I recognized the owner of the voice.

“Niki-chan!” I jumped to my feet and slung my arms over her shoulders and pulled her into a tight embrace.

“Anou, Yamada-san, wait, what are you doing?” she asked, I can sense confusion in her voice.

I bowed my head and said, “Gomen. Gomen nasai. Please forgive me, Niki-chan. Please don’t leave me.”

“But I thought you want me out of your life, that’s why you filed for the divorce,” she asked.

“That was what I thought, but I was wrong. I realized that I cannot live without you. I missed you. I love you,” I hugged her even tighter but she just pulled herself out of the embrace.

“I’m sorry, Yamada-san, but I really have to leave. I’ve got something to take care of in the Philippines. I’m so sorry.”

“Please, don’t leave,” I said. I took the divorce papers that she signed and tear it off in front of her. “These papers mean nothing now, you’re still my wife. You can’t marry another man,” I told her.

She just smiled, “Of course, I won’t marry another man. I’ve had the best husband on earth, and no one can ever replace him in the whole world,” she took my hand. “I’ll be sending you love letters, okay? I love you, but I have to take my master’s degree in the Philippines. I’ll be visiting you during our vacation, okay?”

“Promise me, you won’t look at any other guy,” I said. “I promise, I won’t do the same mistake again.”

“You better keep that promise, or else I won’t send you photos of our baby.” My eyes widened and my jaw drooped at what she said. I was still at a loss for words when she took my hands and put them in her tummy. “Say hello to our baby,” she said, smiling.

“Hello, baby,” I whispered into Niki’s tummy.

“I’ll be going back here before I give birth to our angel, that’s a promise.” She hugged me and said her goodbye. I said goodbye. And I watched her get on the plane and I waited for the plane to take off. I went home with a huge smile plastered on my face.