Fanfiction 7: A Day to REMEMBER: Only I can have you

Title: Only I can have you

Author: Marve Bolinas
Properly Credit to author and Ryosuke Yamaa PHFC
Pairing: Yamachii, Takachii (slight)
Genre: Oneshot, romance, angst, tragedy
Rating: PG18- NC-15
Summary: If ryosuke couldn't have yuri, no one will.

Yamada Ryosuke's POV
"Yuri, I love you.."

Ah, he's finally here. he's finally in class yet there he goes again, smiling to everyone as if he's the happiest person in the world when it's only seeing his classmates. yuri, what's with that face? you always show that to everyone. why can't you only show it to me?

You passed by my seat since yours is just beside mine, but before that, you smiled at me and nodded which I also did. yuri, I swear I wanted to stop time at that exact moment. you smiling at me and me only.

I want to have your smile,
I want to have your soothing and calming voice,
those sparkly eyes,

those cute lips.
I want to have you.
I stared at you after you took your seat without you noticing then saw tears in your eyes. why? why are you always crying when you're alone? what's wrong? it's not the first time that I've seen you cry. I've seen you cry the first time we met. the school's entrance ceremony.

--Flashback--

"And here with us to give a speech is the person who topped the entrance exam. may he bless you with your future educational life here at horikoshi gakuen, chinen yuri."


Everyone clapped as a short but stunning man appeared on the stage, ready to give his speech.


"eeh~ kawaii janai?"


"such a person topped the exams? I want him to be my friend"


"his skin looks so smooth~"


"onna mitai! kyaa!!"


Chinen yuri, who was a 16 year old guy at that time, the person I love, took the crowd's attention. at first I wasn't interested at him since he was a guy but, seeing his cute stature, I became interested and listened to him talking.


As expected, his voice is cute just like him. but I wonder how such a cute guy like him became so smart? I'm sure he was popular in his previous school. probably with both girls and boys.


The entrance ceremony ended with the roar of the new freshmen students, getting psyched up about highschool in horikoshi but unlike them, I was just there, sitting and waiting for it to end. not only the ceremony, not only highschool, but also my life. yes, I wanted to die at that time. I didn't know why i was born anyway. I didn't have a purpose.


I'm just your regular teenage boy. nothing special. I don't even know why I desired death so much. maybe it's because I know life is dull and meaningless. but, everything changed when I went to the bathroom right after everyone has left the hall.


"h-hai.. otou-san.. classes are just about to start.. hai, please don't worry about anything.. I will study hard.. un.. mata n--"


I was washing my hands when I heard someone talking on the phone with his dad inside a stall. the voice seems familiar but, there's something wrong with it. maa iika? it's not my business anyway.


suddenly, the door opened and there I saw chinen yuri, the guy who gave a speech until just now. but, opposite to his cheeky and sparkling smiling face earlier, this time, he was crying. his eyes were red and swollen. did his dad scold him? but why?


"a-anou, chinen kun deshou? daijoubu?"


I asked him just to be polite but what surprised me was what happened next. he hugged me suddenly. he hugged me so tight that i could barely breath then he cried. he cried as if he was crying to the person he has known all of his life, he cried as if he was suffering in hell.


I caressed his back to soothe whatever pain he's having, wondering if it somehow helped, but I guess I would never know. we stood there just like that for a good hour until class started.

----

And since from that day on, I have been aware of him. I can't keep him out of my mind, not only his smiling face, but also that face he made when he was crying, then after a few weeks, I found myself in love with him. I tried to be friends but, he kept pushing me away. we've been in the same class for three consecutive years, but we've never been friends. now, we're both 18 year old and still, I can't come close to him and help him with his troubles.


I want to help.


I want to save him.


"Chinen kun, can you help me with this question?" our class president said after our first lesson. yuri should be the class president but why didn't anyone voted him?


"sure kaichou~ let me show you"


He's smiling. I like it when he smiles, it's comforting me somehow, it's the same feeling as you were in northpole without any clothes on for an hour, feeling cold and hopeless, and then the sun came, giving you all the warmth that you needed. a relaxing feeling.


"Arigattou chinen kun!"


"Douita~"


she left. I guess it's time for me to talk to him this time.


"Ne, chii" I said as i moved my seat closer to him, hoping that I could get a sniff of his scent.


"What?"


cold. why is he always so cold to me? did I do something?


"I just wanted to know if we can eat lunch together today~"


"ah, gomen yamada kun, i'm having it with my boyfriend"


ah yes, the famous boyfriend. Takaki yuya, my rival. I dont even know why or how he became yuri's boyfriend. he's a punk and a trouble maker. he's not even half as smart as me, and they say I was an idiot. he's a delinquent yuri! why are you with him.


"sou da ne? jaa, next time then~"


"un, next time"


chuckling, I went back to my desk. I still couldn't understand why he chose takaki kun. it was just a few months ago that they've started dating. and before that, I haven't seen them together at all.


what's with this?


why can't I have you.



It was lunch time and it was the appointed time of his and takaki kun's lunch date. I can't bear with it anymore. so after seeing yuri packing his lunch and rushing to their meeting place, the rooftop, I silently followed him. this is going to be my first time seeing them together. I want to know what kind of person takaki kun is. why yuri picked him.


"s-stop it t-takaki sama~!"


"uruse bimbo! I can do whatever I want with you!"


This scene, isn't this bad? I just arrived at the rooftop, peaking through the door and I saw yuri's lunch box wasted on the floor, takaki kun on top of of yuri, and yuri with red cheeks that I assume was because of a slap that takaki kun gave him and his torn uniform. what happened?


"t-takaki sama! onegai, n-not here.."


"you can't order me around you scum! your dad sold you to me to pay off his debts. you're just a toy!"


"a-ahh!  yamete!"


sou... yuri was actually poor. his family is broken, a mom who does nothing but smoke and play with his guys and a dad who only knows how to gamble and drink beer. yuri was an abused child. born with utmost physical beauty but with a broken heart, body and soul. I first found out around august on my first year. we weren't close but I used to stalk him at school, but one time, I stalked him until his house.

--Flashback--

"mou~ until when is he going to walk? i've been following him for an hour already and not once have he rode a train. should I just go home?"


Just when I was about to give up, I saw yuri going inside a small apartment, I assumed that he lived alone because the apartment looked so old and rusty. as if it was going to collapse at any moment. but then as I saw him ringing the doorbell of his room instead of taking out his keys, I wondered if he lived with someone.


"What?! you're back home already!? good for nothing child. I allowed you to have a scholarship and pushed you to a good school and you're still coming back here?! just die already!"


wh-what? was that his ... mom? why is she naked? why is she holding a beer and a cigar? why is she shouting at yuri?


"Just let him in mika~ we can still have fun while he's around~"


who-who's that guy? his dad probably and he's also naked, licking his wife's neck.


"o-okaasan... please don't do this outside, and don't invite strangers in our house."


chotto! stranger?! that's not his dad? then why are they--- my questions stopped when I saw that guy grabbing yuri by the arm then slammed the door. I was worried, but what could I do? I'm just your regular boy.

moments later, I heard screaming and laughter. that voice... isn't it yuri's? why is he screaming? is he ok? I tried listening through the door but all I heard was banging and glasses breaking.. but most of all, yuri, shouting.

"st-stop! it hurts! o-okaasan tasukete"

yuri...

----

I knew that yuri was raped by that guy but I couldn't do anything. I kept following him every night since that time because I was worried. but every night was the same. I would always hear yuri getting raped by different guys who were all brought by his mom, until one day, I felt useless the more I did. I couldn't do anything yet I kept following him. I stopped.


"aa-ahh~ t-takaki sama.. s-slower please..."


"i'll do whatever I want with you!"


Just like what I did back then, I just watched another man raping yuri, the person I love. I kept staring at yuri who's asshole was drilled by takaki kun again and again. I listened to yuri's screaming moans and pain with each thrust that takaki makes. and just like how I always react to it,


I got turned on.


While takaki kun kept banging yuri, I unzipped my pants and started stroking my own hard rod, staring at yuri's expression. oh God, it was so hot. I stared at how takaki kun kissed yuri's luscious lips, sucking his tongue and licking his saliva. oh how I wished it was me doing that. torturing yet at the same time, pleasuring yuri. my yuri.

I came together as they did.I wasn't ashamed at all. it felt good. I saw how takaki kun's cum was leaking out of yuri's hole and how he licked them all clean. why can't it be me? why wasn't I rich? if I was rich, I would have yuri on fours and fuck him all day long whether he liked it or not.

I stood up, clearing all my fantasies as I saw takaki kun about to come out. I hid and thankfully, he didn't see me. lucky bastard, he owns my yuri's body.

I rushed to yuri's side and covered him with my jacket, I wonder if it still hurts? but damn he's so hot right now.


"daijoubu chii?"


"n-no y-yamete! don't look at me!"


"shh, chii, it's me don't worry."


"ah, y-yamada kun..."


I caress his head and hugged him. he cried again, for the second time. he cried while I was hugging him, but unlike last time, I know that he has suffered more than he did three years ago. I can't help it.


I love him.


I want to save him.


I want to keep him from everyone else.


"chii, come with me..." I said as I stared into my yuri's beautiful eyes while caressing his cheeks.


he nodded and I helped him stand up.


we skipped class and I brought him to my apartment. I knew he needed to rest, probably the first ever satisfying rest.


"ne chii, do you like this place?"


I asked as I gave him a glass of water. he was sitting on my couch so, I sat beside him and caressed his head after.


"well, it's quiet... I like it yamada kun."


finally, that smile. the smile that I wanted to see. but no, it's a fake smile.


"live with me"


he stared at me for a while with widened eyes. I'm sure he's shocked but, this is the only way I know that I can protect him.


"b-but yamada kun, we've barely met and... I just can't..."


"don't you remember? I've been in the same class with you this entire three years! I consider you as my friend, please... I don't want your family hurting you anymore"


"you know don't you? what kind of family I have, what kind of life I'm having..."


"c-chii, I love you let me protect you"


"y-yamada kun? no! I don't want to involve you! wh-why do you think I've always stayed away from you?! y-you're a nice guy but... a nice guy like you isn't suited for me.."


what? he was avoiding me all these years... yet I love him! why can't he see that?


"chii, stay with me please, let's start anew."

I held his hands as I keep staring at him, hoping that he will say yes. I really want him to trust me. trust my love for him.


"g-gomen yamada kun... I can't.. I belong to takaki sama now, w-we.. we're suited for each other.."


"no! he's hurting you chii! come with me, I will cherish you and love you, I will protect you from any harm"


".... I love him yamada kun, he may seem cruel, but.. actually, he's a nice guy"


y-yuri loves him


I stood up and stepped back, just staring at the floor, motionless. I don't know how to react. my yuri, he loves another guy and not me.


"gomen yamada kun... I'll leave now, umm... "


I stared at yuri... not my yuri anymore. he stood up and bowed before walking to the kitchen to place his used glass. I followed him. my eyes was filled with rage, jealousy, hurt and pain. why don't you love me back? I'm the only one who cares for you more than anyone else in this world!


why?


why?!


I saw him turning back at me then he smiled. a smile that I've never seen before, a smile that looked like as if he was in pain, as if the corners of his mouth were just stapled up to look like he's smiling. but I knew he was hurt. and as he turned around, he hugged me tight. he stared at me for a while before kissing me fully on the lips. I kissed back, hugging his waist. oh how I wanted this to happen. how I have always dreamt of this. I kept kissing yuri, my yuri, until he was out of breath. then he smiled. now where have I seen that smile before? oh yeah, that smile that is always on his face whenever I see him with takaki kun. his true smile.


I woke up, feeling sticky all over. I looked around and I was in the kitchen, sitting on the floor. where's yuri? I looked at my lap and saw him. naked with all of his cum covering both of us. but wait, I stared more into the sticky substance and saw some turning to red.


blood.


oh yeah,  remembered.


I raped yuri,


my yuri.

--Flashback--

I saw him turning back at me then he smiled. a smile that I've never seen before, a smile that looked like as if he was in pain, as if the corners of his mouth were just stapled up to look like he's smiling. but I knew he was hurt. and as he turned around, I grabbed his shoulders and pushed him to the wall, I ravished his lips lustfully. how can he choose takaki kun over me. he's mine. yuri, you're mine!


"y-yamada kun, w-wait!"


I ignored him as i tore his clothes just like how that takaki tore it. does he like this? does he like being forced to?! my sweet and innocent yuri likes getting fucked hard. my yuri that has been fucked by different kinds of guys. my yuri. it's time I too get a taste of what's mine.


"a-ahh~ s-stop it! y-yamada kun!! ittai !"

I kept shoving my dick inside his hole, just like how I've always wanted to do it. he was on the floor on all fours, naked and I was standing, holding his waist as I moved him to thrust at the same pace with me.


I kept thrusting...


faster..


harder...


deeper..


until I came hard inside him. finally, my cum is inside him.


"y-yamada kun, o-onegai, let me c-cum.."


I tied his cute little dick with a rope as a punishment for loving that bastard, but because my yuri wants it, I'll let him cum. see yuri?! I'm much of a better guy than him! why not me?! if you want hard, I can be as hard as anyone!


I pulled him to sit on my laps then stared at him as he started moving on his own, bouncing on my cock, moaning. my dear yuri, my sweet yuri. I love you. he kept moaning louder and louder as he was about to reach his climax. he stroked his dick and fuck, it was the hottest. but then, he moaned... he moaned that bastard's name. not mine.


I stared at him as he came, shivering because of my cock. and not because of that bastard or any other bastards. then he lifted himself off me, staring at me.


I smiled at him.


he smiled at me.


I caressed his cheeks.


tears fell from his eyes.


"I-I wish we were made for each other.. I really lo---"


before he got to finish what he was saying, I stabbed him. I stabbed his back with a knife that I was holding since awhile ago. I stabbed him again and again, watching his back getting covered with his blood. I stared at him for a while and saw him smile. a genuine smile.. not a smile that he had with takaki, a different smile, a smile that he only had with me. my smile. my yuri. I stared at him as blood came out of his mouth.



" Yuri... "



I kissed his lips.


I kissed his forehead,


his cheeks.


" R-ryosu..ke .. I l...ove you... "


he caressed my cheeks while smiling. how could he smile at me while I'm killing him?



he's happy to be mine.


he's happy to die in my arms.



I love you too yuri. my yuri.


" Now you're mine forever " I whispered in his ears.



I kissed him until, there was no longer a soul lingering in his eyes. I saw how his lips turned pale, his skin from hot to cold, his smile fading. I killed him.

----

That's right...


I knew that he has been aware of me.


I knew that all these years he has been staring at me.


I knew that he blushes everytime I talk to him no matter how cold he acted.


I knew that he loves me.


I knew everything.


but I also knew I couldn't do anything about it. I couldn't do anything to have him. I couldn't save him. yuri is only mine. my yuri.





And If I can't have him, No one will.


















-end-